Reframing

Living in China is a very difficult thing to do.  I’m pretty certain that any foreigner who’s come to live in China would agree with that.  A lot of little things happen on an almost daily basis that can really drive you crazy!  Why are roads left full of pot holes?  Why does the repairman leave all kind of junk on my floor when he leaves?  Why are people at my school still staring at me after I’ve been here for a year?  Why do we have to teach on weekends to make up the days we have holidays??

I could go on and on.  If I let all these little things get to me, they would become huge things and I would always be angry.  However, if there’s one thing I’ve learned about living in China, it’s how to reframe things so they are more positive. 

Just this morning I was glancing through the journal entries I last year, and I was struck by some pretty negative ideas from one day in December:

“I’m starting to get really bored here.”

“The honeymoon phase is definitely over.”

“I’m tired of all the stupid questions that students always ask me: ‘Can you use chopsticks?’ ‘Can you speak Chinese?’ ‘Do you have a boyfriend?’

Of course there are still some days when I feel bored or lonely or that the days are all the same.  But last week I did an activity with some of my classes to break up the monotony of repeated questions.  Usually on the first day of class, I reserve some time for students to ask any question about me, and those three are just some examples of the inane questions I often receive.  So this year I decided to do something different.  I made posters with questions and they had to guess the answers about me.  I made it a competition by dividing the class into groups.  If they got a question right, their group would get one point, and if not I would go to the next group until someone gave the correct answer.  I included some of the most commonly asked questions (how many people are in your family, when did you come to China, how old are you, etc) as well as other questions that I think are interesting that they might not think to ask (what was your major, how many countries have you been to, where did you study abroad).  The result was a really fun competition.  I got some interesting answers: some thought I was 26; I was from Russia; I majored in Chemistry.  I have no siblings.  My trick question was, Does Mira have a boyfriend? How old is he?  Most groups would just jump to telling me the age, but I kept repeating the first part of the question until someone responded that I don’t have a boyfriend, which is the correct answer.

Something rather frustrating about my schedule this semester is that every day except Thursday, I have a split period: I teach a class 1.5 hours but it’s split up by the lunch break in between.  Monday and Tuesday I only have one class each day, but because it’s the split class, I can’t relax or feel done after lunch.  I think this is rather silly but I understand that they had to do that.  And the good thing is that if, like today, I realize the lesson I’d planned is too hard, I have time before the second half of the class to revise it!  I was teaching about syllables today, and I’d wanted to talk about stressed vs unstressed syllables, but I realized after the first half that they seemed a little lost.  So then I modified the lesson to focus on counting syllables.

Plus, I can’t really complain about my schedule this year because this year I have 250 students… last year I taught about 700.  Life is good!

The last example of my endeavors to reframe negative things as positive things is in regards to the English library.  Last year, we shared a space with an art classroom, but there was a wall in between so there were two clearly separated rooms.  We could be doing English Corner while an art class was in session and we’d each have privacy.  Imagine my surprise when I took the new foreign teacher, Kayla, up to see the English library, only to find that the wall had been taken out completely, leaving one giant room!  My jaw definitely dropped.  Our books and shelves were all still there, but what was to become of our precious library??  Apparently the school didn’t realize the effect that would have, but that space was so valuable to us foreign teachers.  We did a lot of activities there, including our weekly English Corner and holiday parties.  It was a big space with desks and chairs but also an open space for dancing and games.  I made a big fuss to the waiban (school official who helps the foreign teachers) and I think he realized how upset I was.  I’m usually pretty indirect when dealing with Chinese people because that is the cultural norm, but this time I was very honest with him.  I said, “I know it’s not your fault, but I want you to know that this makes me really mad.”  Since then, he has talked to the school president and they are currently clearing out a room for us.  I have no idea where it will be, so for now all I can hope is that it will be better in some way: bigger, on the ground floor instead of the 4^th where it had been, or it will have a monitor for showing movies.

Our library last year (enclosed, with walls all around!)

GASP!! Where's the wall???  (Can you see that column in the first picture?  And the WALL with windows on either side of it? GONE!!!)