Once again in my life I find myself needing to adjust my concept of productivity and time well-spent.  When I studied abroad in Mexico, this was a big challenge for me. Before then, I had always defined my time by how much I got done, and how many tasks I checked off my to-do list for the day. Everything changed during my time in Mexico because nothing is predictable, and you never get as much done as you want (if you are so naïve to think that you can get a lot done in Mexico!).  Stores are randomly closed throughout the day; if you see people you know it’s expected that you stop and talk with them for a while. There are always delays and it’s something that took me a while to get used to. But once I did, I totally fell in love with the Mexican way of thinking and living: what matters is the moment. Keep an eye on the future but don’t obsess about it. 

China is the same way and it’s something that’s taking me a while to get back into.  Unpredictability is the norm especially living with a host family.  I never know what they have planned for me until the day of, and many times we go out to tea with their friends, and end up sitting for hours and hours. I have no control of where we go or when we leave.  Now I know to always bring my journal or Chinese notebook whenever I go out with them! Still, it can be frustrating after 3, 4, 5 hours of sitting, when I wanted to spend my weekend doing my own things. I like to spend time with my host family but my contribution to any conversation ends after a very short time, whereas they never seem to run out of things to talk about with their friends.  (At least in Mexico if I was out with people for a long time I could converse and meet new people!) I’ve learned that there is no reason why I have to sit with them like a zombie- I usually pull out my notebook and review some Chinese or wander around. I think my host parents understand that I like being with them, I just don’t have much I can say that they will understand. Our conversations are still so limited, even though I technically have learned a lot of Chinese by now. It’s all just small talk though.

                Today we actually went to a really cool place. It’s a departure point for people going rock climbing and backpacking.  Actually have no idea what it was, but we’re call it the jungle adventure place.  It was so beautiful and green!!! We ate at a place down the road.  It was a beautiful place to be, and it was so nice to get out of the city and the humidity! After lunch, we settled down at a table and after short time my attention started to wander and I got restless. There was a lovely creek, and I spent a long time walking through the water and jumping on the boulders like a frog.   I made friends with two little girls also playing in the creek, watched some women play mahjong, lay in a hammock, and took lots of pictures.  I kept wondering when we’d go home, but I also tried to just enjoy all the beauty and the fact that I am done with teaching for now (we just finished teaching at model school, which was the hardest part of training so far! It was so time consuming preparing all the lessons, and a little nerve wracking because I’ve never taught before so that was my first time). 

                I am grateful to have the time today with nothing to do to reflect on my time in China so far.  There’s nothing like sitting in beautiful nature for doing some good thinking!  I have come to the conclusion that I have been taking things to seriously these past few weeks. I just want to make a good impression on the Peace Corps staff and not fall behind in any of the work, but I think I’ve been worrying too much. I’ve broken down and cried in front of other trainees several times now because of model school and Chinese class.  I’m not a nervous wreck, I swear!  That’s pretty unusual for me, actually. Some of the other Peace Corps trainees still don’t understand my sense of humor- I think I come off as being really serious to some people so they totally don’t get when I am being sarcastic or joking (which is most of the time!).  While sitting on the boulders with my feet in the cold water today I realized I need to be happier, and not let things like the humidity and being constantly sweaty get me down so much!  I don’t want to give people the wrong impression of me.  I think because China is so different from anything I’ve ever done before and I’m not a fan of huge cities, maybe I’ve been a little reserved or on edge these past few weeks, and I really want to turn that around in these last few weeks of training before we all split up to our respective sites.

                I’m excited for site placement (we find out our home for the next two years this Thursday-eek!) but also sad because it means I will have to leave my friends.  I came into Peace Corps not knowing anyone and now I have so many good friends and I am not looking forward to having to say goodbye to them. The great thing is that we will be able to visit each other and see new places, and several of us want to travel in Southeast Asia.  Plus there will be trainings and summer projects together to look forward to, but nonetheless, the initial parting will be hard.  My life in China so far has been somewhat isolated and sheltered, and it’s about to get real in a few weeks. I will be on my own, potentially with people who have very little interaction with foreigners.

Me at the jungle adventure place

                All I can do now is think about today. What will come, will come and I know I will be able to handle whatever that is.  

The 80's called and they want their phone back!

I'd like to introduce you to the phone that I'm using during PreService Training. The story behind it is just that my host family has hosted two other volunteers so they've had this phone for.... a while.... They just added more money on it for me.  Let me tell you, if I had a dollar for every time someone got excited when the saw my phone, I would be rich now.  It is definitely the joke of my training site. It can only handle all caps, so people always give me a hard time for yelling at them when I send them a text message (hey at least it CAN send texts!!! You wouldn't think so from looking it.)  My joke is that I can never go anywhere without my purse because I need it just to hold my phone... it doesn't fit in my pockets.  It's okay though, I think it's hilarious. I'm just waiting for Marty McFly to show up in the Flying DeLorean and try to take it back from me!

Language barrier has nothing on me

It is in those times of desperation that we realize how far adrenaline can get us.

Yesterday I hung out with two friends (Isabella and Mike) after classes at school (yes we had classes on a Saturday- every Saturday, in fact).  We went to Mike’s host family’s apartment and played cards with his host brother and then braved the pouring rain in order to get dinner at the nearest food place, which happened to be McDonalds (ok I admit it, we all really wanted to go there. After three weeks of oily Chinese food, a burger and fries was a really welcome- and delicious- change of flavors).  We went back to Mike’s place and watched some episodes of Big Bang Theory.  By then it was about 10:30 at night and Izzy and I had to leave.  Mike helped me catch a taxi because he knows Chinese better than I do, and next thing I knew I was zipping off toward Sichuan University, because I had left my bike there. My plan was to get dropped off there, grab my bike, and ride home.

However, I had left my bike inside a gated courtyard and by that time the courtyard was locked up.  I didn’t let that phase me, though, and I just turned around and went back out the university to catch another taxi. However, the driver did not know where my address was, even though I showed him a card with it written in Chinese characters. So I let him drive off and decided I would just try walking.  After about twenty minutes of walking over slippery cobblestones that were still wet from the afternoon’s deluge, and dodging puddles, I had not gotten very far at all.  The whole trip between home and school takes about 20 minutes by bike, and I thought it would be about double walking. However, the distance I had covered in 20 minutes of walking I could cover in about 5 on my bike.  By this time I think it was after 11, and the Peace Corps asks us to be back home by 11 as a courtesy to our host families.  I wasn’t too tired but I realized the impossibility of my pedestrian pilgrimage and I really didn’t want my host family to get too worried. I also didn’t want to get home well after midnight.  I pulled out my Chinese dictionary and wrote down the words for left and right and hailed another taxi, determined that I would communicate my destination to him.  I said to the driver, in Chinese, “I don’t speak Chinese but I can tell you left and right.”  I guess that’s a pretty vague thing, and the driver did seem a little confused, but I could tell he wanted to help. I kept indicating my right and left hands and speaking as well as I could in the very limited Chinese I have in my arsenal, and finally he nodded and let me in. Ten minutes later I was walking up to my apartment complex, feeling very proud of myself.  Yes it was my fault that I had left my bike at school in a gate that would be locked late at night, but instead of panicking I rallied the little Chinese I had and was able to direct a taxi driver to my place.  As I write this, I realize it may not seem like a big deal, but I felt pretty victorious to not have had to walk over an hour on wet slippery ground late at night in a foreign country.  The main victory was the initial request of conveying to a taxi driver that I couldn’t speak his language or give him a final destination, but that I could direct him how to get where I wanted to go.

Now I just need to figure out how to say “Can you please pick me up at school” in Chinese so if this happens again I can just ask for help from my host parents. 

A note on my posts

PS I don't know why certain parts of my blog show up in white. I am not doing that on purpose so I am sorry if it bothers you! Just highlight the text with your cursor and it will be easier to read.

Also, I hope no one is expecting a post every other day! I have language training and TEFL training every day, Monday through Friday, from 8:30 to about 5:30. I come home sweaty and exhausted, take a shower, eat with my host family, then study until my brain turns to mush (around 9:30 or 10) and then sleep.  Peace Corps training is definitely one of the most intense experiences I have had. We even have four hours of language class every Saturday!! My goal is to write a blog posting at least once a week.  I am definitely not complaining, in fact I relish the challenge and I am enjoying the opportunity for growth. I just want to keep things real for everyone!

Please send me your questions about my experience!

Check your Western standards at the door

There are definitely a lot of things in China that are weird to me: squat toilets; traffic rules (or lack thereof); trash piles on sidewalks; people spitting really loudly in public; etc.  My survival strategy, though, in order to keep my own sanity, is to not judge ANYTHING by Western standards but rather just accept things as I see them.

Squat toilets really aren’t that bad, and I hear it’s more natural for your body than sitting on a toilet (Peace Corps volunteers learn quickly to get over qualms about talking about bathroom stuff so I apologize if this is TMI). 

The traffic is chaotic without a doubt but there is a rhythm to the madness, which I am adapting to every day as I ride my bike to school.  People pull out of driveways without looking for oncoming traffic. Cars move in to the bike lane to pass other cars.  Cars pass other cars- that is a BIG thing here, even on narrow two lane roads with lots of curves (like the one along the river I follow to get to school).  I have only been biking to school for a week but I already feel like I kind of understand the flow.  It’s a matter of being assertive, especially when making left turns.  The best thing is to get in the turn lane, especially if there are already cars there waiting to turn. Then you just go with them and then get back to the right side (“bike lane”).  If not you have to wait at the cross walk which can take a long time.  You have to be alert of what’s going on but also just keeping doing your thing. Like when cars are zooming past me honking like crazy I don’t freak out. And actually it’s nothing personal, but it’s just how cars communicate. This makes a lot of sense! In America people only honk if they are angry or annoyed, whereas in China it’s a whole other language by itself. You honk to let someone know you are about to pass them; you honk before going around a curve; you honk to alert another car or biker of your presence.  It’s not unfriendly, and as jarring as it can be, it makes sense to communicate with your horn and not just express negative emotions.   By the way, every time I can make a left turn without having to use the cross walk I get super excited- it’s like a little victory of integrating into the society here!  As for the trash piles and public spitting, that is still really gross to me and I don’t know if I will ever be cool with it but at least I am learning to ignore it.

Let me just say that it is great to be an easy-going and adaptable person when traveling.  I am so grateful to not have any special dietary needs.  I can eat whatever is handed to me and I generally don’t get an upset stomach (knock on wood). Some of the things that other volunteers complain about don’t really bother me. Like some people still avoid the squat toilets, because their host families have Western toilets, and there is one on campus, in the Peace Corps office.  I got over my aversion to that the first full day in China. I will admit it was a little off-putting to me when I first arrived but once I did it, I no longer worried about how weird it was. It’s just what you do. Plus you can’t not go to the bathroom, so why not just get over it?  The one thing that is sometimes hard for me is the heat and humidity.  Fortunately, most days it’s overcast, which means that although it’s still hot and humid it’s a little more bearable.  Yesterday, on the other hand, was super sunny.  Normally I love sun but here it’s just makes it darn near unbearably hot and the mosquitos come out more and everyone smells bad.  Being super hot and super tired from the intense week of training and language learning made me a little crabby yesterday!

Speaking of language, today I was invited to join another beginner class that moves a little more quickly than the class I am currently in. Which is exciting because it means that I have made progress and it’s been noticed by the language teachers! I am sad to leave my class because the atmosphere is very light-hearted and we can laugh at our own mistakes.  I like those classmates. However, it will be nice to move a little bit more quickly in learning the language.  I can often understand when my teacher asks us questions and generally I can respond appropriately.  Communication with my host family is still hit or miss but I am getting used to the questions/statements my host mom asks/makes every day, like what did you eat for lunch, do you like it, eat more, and eat slowly.  There are still times when I stare blankly at her after she says something even if it’s something she’s said half a dozen times before, but it’s getting better.   

Chinese is actually pretty logical and many times a word will be the combination of other words: for example, delicious (hao chi) is a combination of good (hao) and eat (chi).  Makes sense, right? I am starting to pick up on the pattern.  It is crazy to think that I just started learning Chinese a week and a half ago, and I now know a stack of vocabulary flash cards that is over an inch high.  I can order food in a restaurant, I can call for help, I can hear a phone number and right down the correct numbers, I can distinguish (some) individual words and sounds I hear people say, I can introduce myself and other people, I can say if I like or don’t like something, I can say if I want or don’t want something, I can bargain in the market…   The Peace Corps definitely does a great job of giving volunteers a crash course in a new language.  It may seem odd to some people that I am in China knowing that I am a Spanish major, but I did request Asia or Eastern Europe because I wanted to experience a brand new culture and learn a language I know nothing about.  It is so exhilarating to me to see that I can be placed in culture as extremely foreign as China, and with a language as COMPLETELY foreign to me as Chinese and see that I can adapt and learn.  Wow, what other joys will this experience bring??

 I am so grateful to be here.  The other volunteers are all exceptional people and every day I learn something from them.  We all come with such different backgrounds and experiences.  Many are like me in that they just graduated college this May, or within the past year. However, several have Masters Degrees have taught quite a bit in the US and/or other countries, like Korea.  We have several Grad students in our midst as well.  They are all so smart, and definitely fun to hang out with.  I feel that I can hang out with anyone from this year’s group of China volunteers and be completely content.  That’s comforting, seeing as how we will be each other’s support group for the next two years! I think we are doing a really good job of supporting each other on our bad days and through our struggles.  It’s hard sometimes to explain to people back home what we are going through here, but we all understand each other.  Whether you’re experiencing diarrhea, homesickness, frustration with the language, anxiety about teaching, or whatever, there is someone else here is going through or has gone through the exact same thing.

A big part of the Peace Corps goals and expectations for its volunteers is that we establish good guanxi, or relationships, with Chinese people, starting with our host families.  They are meant to be the support system we would normally get from our family in the US.  The goal is cross-cultural exchange: we teach them English and American culture and they teach us Mandarin and Chinese culture.  I am striving to do my best to establish good relationships with my host family.  As it’s only been a few days it is still kind of awkward with the language barrier, but we can communicate the important things through isolated words, poor grammar, and gestures/charades.  It definitely pushes me to be creative in my communication!  Their English level is maybe just a little bit better than my Chinese level.  My problem is that I can’t always remember Chinese words just after hearing them. I need to hear it several times, say it several times, see it and write several times.  Many times they ask me a question like, “Do you like?,” “Did you sleep well?,” “ Do you want?”  Even though I have heard those questions several times by now I often stare back at them with a blank look, and then they say it in broken English. Good thing they are really patient! It's also nice to see that they are trying to learn English, too. We are in the same boat. I think it would be harder if they had no interest in learning English.

I try to also be patient with myself and keep a sense of humor, which is easy for me, as you may know.  I enjoy joining them in their evening walks around the neighborhood and observing all the people walking around.  I’m not used to that, because in Ventura everyone is pretty much in their homes in the evening except for a few people out walking their dogs or exercising.  But here it’s so hot that the whole community takes to the streets to walk and chat.  That is kind of nice. I have always wanted to live in a place like that, and to know my neighbors.  One night we walked to a little shop to get a house key made for me, and while the guy was carving it, I talked with some young kids who are learning English. I taught gave them high fives, which they loved, and taught them to say “what’s up” which I am not sure that they understood!   I also watch Chinese TV with my host parents, and one night we watched Up with Chinese subtitles!  I have gone with my host dad to watch him fly his model airplanes with his buddies.  I really want to be a part of their routines and activities! I am hoping to learn mehjong which is a popular Chinese board game.  I also review what I learn in my Chinese lessons with them, and they help me with my pronunciation.  I think I am really lucky with my host family because some of the other volunteers live with families that are less patient or less understanding of personal space. My host parents don’t seem to mind that I spend hours on my computer, on Skype or reading materials for my Peace Corps training sessions.  My host dad is really funny and he loves American culture. He loves the movie Kung Fu Panda, Celine Dion, and KFC.  The other day he demonstrated to me the difference between the way Chinese and Americans eat: the Chinese people shovel their food and make a lot of noise slurping their noodles. But Americans will take a bite, put their fork down to say something, wipe their mouths, and then take another bite.  It was really funny to see him do impressions of both groups!

Firsts

     Seeing as how this is my first official blog from within China, I thought I would start off by sharing my firsts so far. There are going to be so many new experiences and mile stones. Here’s to my many more!

(Just a note on terms I will be using in my blog: As of last Friday when we had our Staging, or Pre-Departure Orientation Training, in LA, we are no longer Peace Corps Invitees but Trainees.  We won’t be official Volunteers until we commit to serving in China and swear in on August 29, and then we will start teaching sometime after that. We are now doing Pre-Service Training, or PST, for the next eight weeks or so until that date. We will be learning Chinese and how to teach English. We also receive training on how take care of our health. Until this Friday, we are all together for Orientation at Sichuan University, and then on Friday we will move in with our host families and separate into different training sites, which are all in Chengdu but at different universities, meaning we will all be 30-40 minutes apart from each other).

First impressions of Chengdu, Sichuan, China

• ·         We walked out of the airport to a wall of humidity, and a light drizzle. It was also very hot.
• ·         Lots of car dealerships
• ·         Lots of construction and building new apartments (there is a house boom so everyone is trying to buy a place to live)
• ·         Sichuan University is huge, and if I understand correctly, there are several large campuses spread out throughout the city so it’s kind of like Oxford where many different schools make up the university

Other Firsts

Yesterday marked the first full day, and so naturally there were a lot of firsts to experience!  The following bullets were all from the same day… keep in mind that I had training from 8:30 until about 3:15. That will give you an idea of how packed (and awesome) my first full day was.

• ·         First time using a squat toilet (twice actually, and it’s not as bad as I thought it would be- in fact, I kind of like it because it’s pretty quick).
• ·         First training sessions of Pre-Service Training, which is the time until the end of August before we actually start teaching. We had our first Mandarin lesson (so exciting!!!!!) and our first health information meeting (there’s a lot to take in! We did get an awesome medical kit that should help us handle anything from diarrhea to itchiness to dehydration to the common cold.
• ·         Ate out at my first restaurant in China. I had delicious dumplings with pork and leek which cost 8 RMB which is the equivalent of about $1.50, which makes me very excited.
• ·         Played Frisbee for the first time in China, with three other trainees.  Several Chinese people walked by us and stared curiously.
• ·         Had my first hot pot. Similar to Korean or Japanese barbeque where you cook your own stuff. We did the all-you-can-eat buffet where you pick up trays of uncooked meat and vegetables and pour into a boiling pot of sauce that’s set into the table.  You wait until it’s cooked and then pull stuff out with your chopsticks or the ladle, and then pour more stuff in. So fun!
• ·         Had my first more-than-three-hour dinner. This was at the hot pot place and we just sat and talked and digested and then got more food and ate more. It was great. We were actually eating with some awesome current volunteers (part of the China 16 and 17 groups. I am China 18 meaning I am part of the 18^th group to be sent to China with Peace Corps since 1993). They had some great stories and advice for us.
• ·         First time at a karaoke bar. After the long dinner, we walked with the current volunteers towards some night clubs and on the way we spotted some friends outside a karaoke bar so of course we ran in and sang some songs (Billie Jean and Sweet Caroline).
• ·         First time dancing at a night club in China, with many Chinese people. We actually went to two different clubs.  Both places had a little stage/ raised areas so we all danced on that, and random Chinese people would come and dance with us.

Without a doubt, that was a highly successful and epic first day.